This is my first interaction with your work after a friend shared it with me.
I was honestly compelled to write a comment and say thank you.
Your piece has deeply and completely moved me. Your words have resonated with me so incredibly and it’s as if you’ve described the last 15 years of my life. I’m 30 and this journey you’re describing is what I’ve been experiencing in a devastating way for my true self. It’s broken me and she’s trapped in that cage of fear for a long while. Though now, I have finally come across something that depicts my thought process in a way I haven’t been able to. Usually I’m able to express my thoughts in therapy or in my journal, but when it comes to this specific topic, I’m at a standstill. Words can never express my thoughts properly. I am going to send this to my therapist and tell her this is it. The breakthrough I’ve been dying to have.
Your creative outlet idea is also incredibly accurate (Along with every other word that just simply blew me away while reading). I’ve moved across the world to be free of the fear you’ve described, and now more than ever I feel this sense of safety to express myself in ways I never thought were possible. So you’re on the money there.
So, an immense thank you. This made me sit up in my chair, it made tears stream down my face (especially the very last paragraph, that was the most validating and honestly painful thing to read, that I have been doing myself and those who are begging to “handle” my unfiltered complexity a disservice by not being true), and it has provided me with the validation I have been searching for (even if, as you say, that validation of course comes from within - I guess you have just helped me finally realise that).
I’m so excited to read more of your work & will be with your substack for life. Ever thought of getting into therapy? Let me know if so 😂
Thanks for reading my comment and letting me indulge in myself freely x
Thanks. A nice reminder and helpful context that is helpful for me. You offer a rich vocabulary to help reframe and understand self-authorship and the tension between awareness and connection
Thanks Brian, I'm glad to hear my words are resonating with you. I'm always looking for new ways to pursue the self—I find a systems lens to be most helpful, which is why a lot of my work is centered around that interconnectedness. Discovering systems thinking truly shifted my perspective and changed my life—and thereby my worldview—so I can only hope to help a few other people along the way by sharing what I've learned, and continue to learn :)
I found this article because someone mentioned it on Tiktok. And I’m so glad I did.
I’m 21 now. That strange in-between stage where you’re no longer a teenager, but adulthood still feels like something you’re tiptoeing into. And for years ( maybe all of them) I’ve felt like I’ve had to earn my place in every room. By shrinking. By reading everyone’s tone before I even found my own. By rehearsing sentences in my head just to seem ‘okay.’ Just to not come off wrong.
This article didn’t just resonate, it met me in that quiet, aching part of myself I usually keep tucked away. It felt like someone saw the version of me I’ve been hiding and whispered, you don’t have to do that anymore.
So thank you. Not just for writing something beautiful. But for writing something true. Something that gave me permission, maybe not to be fearless, but at least to stop folding.
i loved this so much. a very much needed reminder. i might need to go back to this whenever i feel self-doubt creeping at me again. i've always struggled using my voice and has always been a prisoner of my own fears. this is exactly the type of words that i needed to hear, probably over and over again. and i love your blog style. thank you for this. keep rocking!
what a kind comment, thanks so much, cha! i'm glad to hear these words resonated with you. i think we all need a little push to remember what we're capable of sometimes. i hope you remember often 🤍
LOVED this read!! I just recently noticed that clarity within myself for the first time and… it’s a natural high honestly. It’s a good type of pride. It’s power
Needed to read this
🫶
This is my first interaction with your work after a friend shared it with me.
I was honestly compelled to write a comment and say thank you.
Your piece has deeply and completely moved me. Your words have resonated with me so incredibly and it’s as if you’ve described the last 15 years of my life. I’m 30 and this journey you’re describing is what I’ve been experiencing in a devastating way for my true self. It’s broken me and she’s trapped in that cage of fear for a long while. Though now, I have finally come across something that depicts my thought process in a way I haven’t been able to. Usually I’m able to express my thoughts in therapy or in my journal, but when it comes to this specific topic, I’m at a standstill. Words can never express my thoughts properly. I am going to send this to my therapist and tell her this is it. The breakthrough I’ve been dying to have.
Your creative outlet idea is also incredibly accurate (Along with every other word that just simply blew me away while reading). I’ve moved across the world to be free of the fear you’ve described, and now more than ever I feel this sense of safety to express myself in ways I never thought were possible. So you’re on the money there.
So, an immense thank you. This made me sit up in my chair, it made tears stream down my face (especially the very last paragraph, that was the most validating and honestly painful thing to read, that I have been doing myself and those who are begging to “handle” my unfiltered complexity a disservice by not being true), and it has provided me with the validation I have been searching for (even if, as you say, that validation of course comes from within - I guess you have just helped me finally realise that).
I’m so excited to read more of your work & will be with your substack for life. Ever thought of getting into therapy? Let me know if so 😂
Thanks for reading my comment and letting me indulge in myself freely x
as an avid comment-section reader. your comment moved me. thank you for sharing xxx
Thanks. A nice reminder and helpful context that is helpful for me. You offer a rich vocabulary to help reframe and understand self-authorship and the tension between awareness and connection
Thanks Brian, I'm glad to hear my words are resonating with you. I'm always looking for new ways to pursue the self—I find a systems lens to be most helpful, which is why a lot of my work is centered around that interconnectedness. Discovering systems thinking truly shifted my perspective and changed my life—and thereby my worldview—so I can only hope to help a few other people along the way by sharing what I've learned, and continue to learn :)
You might want to look into the connectivity theory of autism if systems thinking speaks to you as a daily lens. (Audhd here.)
What a way to frame "palatable" as an opaque prison. This is the juice worth reading.
Juicy! Thanks, Sung. x
I found this article because someone mentioned it on Tiktok. And I’m so glad I did.
I’m 21 now. That strange in-between stage where you’re no longer a teenager, but adulthood still feels like something you’re tiptoeing into. And for years ( maybe all of them) I’ve felt like I’ve had to earn my place in every room. By shrinking. By reading everyone’s tone before I even found my own. By rehearsing sentences in my head just to seem ‘okay.’ Just to not come off wrong.
This article didn’t just resonate, it met me in that quiet, aching part of myself I usually keep tucked away. It felt like someone saw the version of me I’ve been hiding and whispered, you don’t have to do that anymore.
So thank you. Not just for writing something beautiful. But for writing something true. Something that gave me permission, maybe not to be fearless, but at least to stop folding.
I feel so seen
🤍
i loved this so much. a very much needed reminder. i might need to go back to this whenever i feel self-doubt creeping at me again. i've always struggled using my voice and has always been a prisoner of my own fears. this is exactly the type of words that i needed to hear, probably over and over again. and i love your blog style. thank you for this. keep rocking!
what a kind comment, thanks so much, cha! i'm glad to hear these words resonated with you. i think we all need a little push to remember what we're capable of sometimes. i hope you remember often 🤍
This resonates so much with me, as someone who’s switching my writing from other socials to substack, it feels like a welcoming! LOVE IT!
Oh I love that—welcome to Substack :)
Universe is universing cuz I BEEN talking about this in therapy lately! It feels so amazing to be an unbothered queen.
Aw I love that so much ✨
I like you
I like you back
LOVED this read!! I just recently noticed that clarity within myself for the first time and… it’s a natural high honestly. It’s a good type of pride. It’s power
It's powerful, indeed. Congrats on finding that in yourself 🤍
oh, i love this so much, i think everyone should read this
thanks so much, june 🤍
I feel so seen by this post 🫶🏽
We see you 😊
i felt so understood reading this - definitely gave me the clarity i needed
I love to hear that, so glad it resonated, Kiran 🤍
what a magnificent summary of the actual problem and refocusing on the important values of life, wow!
thanks so much, elena 🥹
The projector in me is having a moment 🥹❤️
🥲❤️